A Long but Incomplete and Still Evolving List of Disclaimers to Accompany My Food Photos and Links

As someone who likes getting the word out about new vegan food options on social media, I have learned the hard way that it’s wise to preface your shares with a long list of disclaimers. A variety of disclaimers that will preemptively reply to every spoken and unspoken question and acknowledge every possible concern. A list of disclaimers to address a litany of issues that the most neurotic person on the planet would would have to get up early to imagine into existence and a list that would acknowledge even the most uncommon allergies. I had no idea the human species was so hair-splitting and doggedly determined to find something to complain or worry about until the advent of social media but I know now. Boy, do I know.

Maybe it’s because vegans are accustomed to looking at and thinking about food critically, but I have found that herbivores will put on their fault-finding goggles with even the most innocuous of food posts. When did we become a nation of obsessive finger-waggers? Maybe we should reserve that for the truly messed up things in the world and not for the fact that I posted something with almonds in it and you don’t eat nuts.

I have come up with this list of disclaimers, many of which I use in a preamble to any food post these days. I just…